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    Living in Transparency

    In the end of this year, 2014, I have a fullness of love and appreciation for the kindness of Abba, His marvelous, abundant provisions in the physical, emotional, spiritual areas of my life and in the lives of others. Both in Joy & Pain . . .

    Part of God's kindness is demonstrated by a continuous revealing of the "state of being" in which I must live to handle this life. That "state of being" is rich in humility, tender & merciful; quick with forgiveness ~ I have this picture of doing Tai Chi moves with forces coming at me, my hands up, rolling the forces past me in a fluid motion so that the energy goes onto God's altar; while love is continually replenished from the river of love flowing from the Lord: streams of living water flowing through me to others. I am blessed to experience His endless love as it flows through. And, the power happens as the river flows through. If I try to hold onto it, the power goes out.

    The power of His love is beyond my ability to comprehend, too strong to contain, ever expanding as it flows through. Much of my learning, in being mentored by God, has been about how to let His power/Love flow through, how to open myself to be a vessel or a conduit. I am experiencing an ever-increasing capacity for Joy the more I yield, surrender, obey on a moment-by-moment basis.

    Pain? Recently I experienced pain when someone I love reacted to the way I am with offense, pouring out their complaint. In reading the hurtful words I could see that my transparency could be offensive, especially when my feelings hit upon wounds in those who believe that not feeling is self-protection.

    Many people believe we can control our feelings, that we have a choice of just putting them away, ignoring them, that dealing with them is not necessary. Until a person understands & experiences the truth that feelings are, (God made us & we are deeply feeling creatures), and that we can learn the valuable knowledge that, 1) just what emotions are difficult for us, then 2) how to return to joy from these difficult emotions, & 3) get healing for the hurts that happened that continue to invade/interfere with our present lives. And, along with these choices we can open our minds & hearts to the truth that there is a living God who knows everything about us & loves us enough to not let us stay in our pain, but arranges life/circumstances to break our hearts open to the fullness of what is possible in supernatural love & relationship.

    When people choose to suspend their disbelief to experience the above, their lives are changed forever. God loves to love, He loves to heal, to complete the works He began in us before time when He wrote our names in the Lamb's Book of Life! Watching His light come into the eyes of people who were formerly dead to the truths of God is one of the greatest moments in my life. And it happens more often the more I let go of having any agenda in life except what Jesus taught, "I do as my Father does." (John 5:30; John 8:28).

    In this state-of-being I can experience the hurtful things that happen & roll that pain onto God's altar while I climb up into Abba's lap, hiding behind his long white beard, pressing my broken heart against his chest, my hyper heart slowly synchronizing with His heartbeat, calm, steady & strong; His healing flows into me, mending, opening, increasing His wisdom in me; changing my view so that I feel the hurt with His forgiving heart & see the person through His eyes, whole & complete; His fullness of Joy rises in me as I experience: His Kingdom comes, on earth as it is in heaven. I am resting in His Fullness & that changes the atmosphere 'round about.

    Joy To The World, The Lord Is Come! 



    Summation of Sequester

    After several years of learning to live in a steady rhythm of joy & quiet, Noel & I were activated back into ministry at the start of February. God chose the groups & motivated us to attend, then to offer to share, which revealed he had prepared the way.

     We are delighted to find ourselves brimming over with affection for people while more at ease in listening to, & moving with, the Holy Spirit.

     Our sharing is about the generosity & wisdom of God as to how one can more actively, willingly co-labor with God in being transformed into one’s original design. In short: how to become the person God intended us to be.



    Out of the darkness

    ~ Written February 15, 2013 ~ by Cynthia Jacobsen

    Since I wrote, Closing 2011, I have been cloistered for a season with Abba.

    To recap: In July, 2011, I fell & broke both bones in my left arm at the wrist. The damage was severe, spreading up through my shoulder to my spine. God arranged for the surgeon who did a fine job putting my left arm/wrist back together, utilizing titanium plates. A few weeks later I started intensive physical therapy, where I was given a book of exercises, which I did for 10 to 12 hours daily through to the fall of 2012.

    While lying on the floor, first realizing the severity of my injuries, the Lord told me my miracle would be in my healing. Today I am blessed to say that I have over 95% return of movement & use of my hand, arm, and shoulder, which is far better than what the doctors thought would happen. God tells the truth.

    In June of 2012, one of my first travels was to attend the Heart & Soul Conference, in Los Angeles, CA., which was an answer to prayer for the Lord to restore my soul. The conference refreshed my spirit with much needed connections with many kindred spirits, friends of the Lord who have spent decades living in, and teaching about, intimacy with Jesus.

    Then I returned home, back to physical therapy and learning to live with my husband full-time who had recently retired from a career that took him to sea at least 70 days at-a-time. Though refreshed and encouraged, doubts tugged at me. I went back into the darkness with the Lord, wondering, asking Abba questions, wanting more.

    A few weeks ago I began reading, starting with one of my favorite daily readings, My Utmost For His Highest, by Oswald Chambers. From mid January through the start of February the readings energized me. I found specific answers to why, what, when, where, how of the previous difficult season. The reading . . .

    The Discipline Of Heeding (2/14) ~ What I tell you in darkness, that speak ye in light: and what ye hear in the ear, that preach ye upon the housetops. — Matthew 10:27 

    "At times God puts us through the discipline of darkness to teach us to heed Him. Song birds are taught to sing in the dark, and we are put into the shadow of God’s hand until we learn to hear Him. "What I tell you in darkness" – watch where God puts you into darkness, and when you are there keep your mouth shut. Are you in the dark just now in your circumstances, or in your life with God? Then remain quiet. If you open your mouth in the dark, you will talk in the wrong mood: darkness is the time to listen. Don’t talk to other people about it; don’t read books to find out the reason of the darkness, but listen and heed. If you talk to other people, you cannot hear what God is saying. When you are in the dark, listen, and God will give you a very precious message for someone else when you get into the light.

    After every time of darkness there comes a mixture of delight and humiliation (if there is delight only, I question whether we have heard God at all), delight in hearing God speak, but chiefly humiliation – What a long time I was in hearing that! How slow I have been in understanding that! And yet God has been saying it all these days and weeks. Now He gives you the gift of humiliation, which brings the softness of heart that will always listen to God now."

    Peace embraced me as I realized that’s where I’d been, sequestered with the Lord, quieted, in the “darkness” in healing, restoration. My long, challenging season was ending. Was I willing to move ahead?

    Over the holidays and into the New Year the Lord arranged for me to bring  “very precious message(s)” to many people. They were simple moments when needs that only God could have known about, were met with such depth every person commented on the power of what was shared with them. Each time I was amazed at the tender mercies that flowed with no effort. The peace that settled over every situation was truly only what God could do.

    The trauma of the previous 1 ½ years melted away in experiencing the power of the Lord move freely through me to bless everyone around me. While being profoundly weak, wretchedly human, Love, Wisdom, & Godly authority poured forth. I have often been speechless with wonder over recent events.

    Am I willing to move ahead? Yes, indeed!