photo by Fabian Moller
Exercises & Ideas That Help You Calm and Be Relational
1. Breathe: Take a deep breath & hold for 4 to 8 seconds; breath out all the air in your lungs & hold for 4 to 8 seconds; Repeat at least 4 times & do as often as needed. [This has proven to activate your nervous system related to functioning & connecting with others & it oxygenates your body, helps your muscles relax.]
2. Sitting in a comfortable, open chair or lying on the floor, or bed: Clench every muscle in your body as tight as you possibly can. While you are doing this check through your body to try to clinch every muscle. Hold for 10 seconds. Then relax every muscle in your body, checking throughout to make sure you are letting them completely release. Repeat at least two times as often as needed. [The more you do this you will find tight muscles that you didn't know were being clenched, often in the shoulders and neck].
3. Bend over at the waist and drop your arms forward, letting them fall like a rag doll towards the floor. You can wiggle, letting your arms dangle, breathing deep in and out, helps you relax. Fun to do with children.
4. Take a walk around your house, outside or inside, fast paced, long strides, swinging your arms, singing or praying your favorite scriptures. Take deep breaths in and out throughout your walk.
5. Turn on Praise Music and dance, any form you like, all around your house & outside. Do this by yourself, with your spouse, and your children, singing alone is good for you, again-breathing.
6. Telling stories of appreciation & Joy: Notice the thoughtful, kind, courteous things people do (re-filling the toilet paper roll, taking their dishes in, setting the table, putting things away, coming up with games)
More you Can do ~ We have much to be grateful for: time to do all kinds of activities that we all put off due to being busy, is an example. Let's take advantage of it.
But First: make sure your basic needs are met:
· Get enough sleep (taking naps during this stressful time is good)
· Eat regular meals and be mindful of what you are putting into your body so that stress is less: Fresh vegies/salads/fruit is good for calming your body; Too much caffeine and sugar will greatly increase stress.
· You can go for walks and be outside, it actually allows for safe distant connections & still gather. However, be mindful of the requests of your government to shelter in place, if your home has outdoor room for activities enjoy them. For those in apartments think creatively. I have seen videos of people who have set up their apartments like mini-gyms, using furniture as exercise equipment.
· Enjoy your home (apartment, or anywhere you are), do deep cleaning, yard work, clear clutter, get caught up on all your "to-do lists," Enjoy creating physical activities with your kids, (there are a lot of creative ideas on social media).
· Read, independently and to one another. Story telling is a great tradition to grow in your family and community. You can even read together online. I've been doing it and it blesses everyone!
· Be creative with cooking, share recipes and menus. Talk about what you appreciate with others as you do meals: This can be done even when you are alone. You have much to be thankful for.
· Learn new skills – great use for those who go online and have some computer knowledge: Tell one another about your skills and practice teaching them to each other. Make it fun.
· Connect voice to voice: hearing tones of voice grows appreciation and joy in your brain. Make phone calls, email, do face-time and other face to face connections: Learn Zoom or other online connection tools. It’s fun.
· Group Connections: if you already have online connecting skills start group communications
o family groups
o prayer groups
o Life Groups
o Rooted connections (check with your Leader to follow suggestions for what to share)
o be creative in connecting
Please consider: Practice just stopping when emotions start to go out of control. You want to stop escalation, the more you fight, the more out of control difficult feelings become. Just Stop! Breathe. Do something else even if it's jumping in place while repeating, "I can do this, We can do this, We will get through this, We are OK, I am OK."
Taking on a sports metaphor is helpful to some people; Meditation on spiritual things is very helpful to many of us; Self talk is effective when it is encouraging, avoid self- criticism. Be careful with media, stay away from information that frightens you including scary movies.