It is a still & quiet, a little after noon on December 27th. Gray skies spritzing snow off & on for a couple hours, melting as it falls. It will be fun doing greeting at church this evening, especially if the snow begins to stick. Yup, I love Christmas & winter especially with snow. Reminds me of my childhood in Montana. Though, I have grown to love the gray, wet, crispness of the NW, which gives way to gorgeous spring.
The fullness of God’s maturing process in me this year was realized when I was finally diagnosed as Celiac [see the “Health & Healing” page]. All my life I’ve had undiagnosed, or misdiagnosed health issues. Drs. wrote, “Failure to thrive” in my medical records from my birth on. As a toddler I had malnutrition & nearly died from pneumonia. Years of curses from professionals, & friends, that my health/frailty was hypochondria or mental illness. Depression & thoughts of suicide followed me in my fears they might be right.
Thanks to the overwhelming pain of my early years I was driven to challenge God about who He is, to reveal Himself in a way I could understand. He answered that challenge and . . .
After years of being mentored, then healed by God, I know: God is who He says He is, The Word is True, He is the Author and Finisher of my faith. I am with Him and there is nothing that will happen He does not allow. Therefore, I am responsible to learn, & practice, the discipline to love & lean into Him, to make more room in me for Him, to put all my concerns on His altar, to place myself totally into His hands, to do with as He wills. In His unfathomable kindness He has revealed how the years of debilitation wrecked my plans, my drive & control, and broke my co-dependency on people, teaching me to be available for His will in prayer & supplication.
Every person who believes in God/The Trinity will come to their own reckoning regarding the bottom line of their faith. There is no escape, except to try to drown Him out with selfishness, the white noise of fleshly, cultural babble. Been there, done that, wasted a lot of time trying to run away, no longer interested. Thank you, Lord, for intervening and saving my life. In His Amazing Grace He renews my revelation of Who He Is as He continues His John 15 process, “ouch! Yes, Lord, sift & prune, ouch! Yes, more.”
Deep breathing, then letting go is a habit I learned that releases the tension in my muscles (including my heart), while declaring God’s truths about my identity & relationship as a daughter to Him, The King. His Word is living, engaging me with loving Him, serving family, community; being available for Him as He arranges ministry in countless ways, however small, always significant to Him and those He loves. It is not a concern that I am unfinished, a work in progress, obedience is better than sacrifice, it’s not about me. He can do Anything! And does!
And, there is this amazing part of my life with Abba: His intercession through me. It has taken years of being with Him for me to understand the power of being submitted in intercession. Today He allows me the extraordinary understanding of some of the visions He assigns for intercession. I call it Prophetic Intercession, as He shows me visions, then allows me to witness portions of the process of their actualizations. I know there are great numbers of intercessors involved in His assignments, He also showed me that vision. Nonetheless, I am honored & astonished to be recruited into His army of intercessors.
The summation of this year, 2015, is not about numbers of events or works, though as I went through our calendar I was surprised at what was accomplished. It is about God’s Love, His Character, His Living Word and the empowerment therein. His Reign over All that Is and Will Be. IT IS FINISHED. He Won! Every move we make in doing what Our Father Does activates His Word, activates His DNA in Every Person With Whom we come in contact with or pray for. Trust Him. He knows what He is doing. He is the great I AM.